Phuket Fantasy

Given my intense love for the sea,it was hard to imagine that all I would be seeking is a flat bed when I had the sea virtually lapping at my hotel doorstep. But I needed to wash off the fatigue that came with an overnight haul with a dinner at 3am on the flight and playing around with all the entertainment that an international flight offers. The service of the Thai airlines is good, though the staff is unsmiling. The music that they offer on board is decidedly superior to the movie fare.

Suvarna bhumi airport or Bangkok airport leaves a lot to be desired. Maybe T3 has spoilt me for smaller international airports, but the wide collection of freely growing orchids left me breathless. The Thais as a people, have this very musical lilt in their voices, but their language I guess is not too sweet. I guess that the melody in the voices is balanced by the loud intonation.

 "Took the wind out of my sails"-the phrase took on a new meaning as we were landing in Phuket. For a fraction of second I got the feeling that I had gained access to heaven and was living happily ever after. Let me tell you- the travel brochures understate, not exaggerate-the limestone cliffs surrounding the aquamarine Andaman sea, swaying palms, windswept roads all welcomed me into my 6 day paradise as the wheels of the aircraft touched ground. The airport looked more like a beachfront resort, where one just saunters into the pristine clean and white beach. The taxis are all Toyotas- 900 bhatt for a distance of 50 kms. The place reminds me of GOA only million times cleaner. The Thais are very particular about cleanliness, even in the most humble of places. I realise how culturally close we are to the Thais as our smiling happy -face driver says in his sing song voice "one mineeth" and goes to a travel company after taking off his shoes. Very soon a cherubic TICHA pronounced as TISHA slides into the passenger seat in the front and starts peddling tour packages. And since I had been forewarned, I happily negotiated and booked for the two activities that were on my must do agenda. The islands cruise and the Simon cabaret- all for 1800 bhatt per person against the asking price of 4400 per person. We all left happy, the taxi driver would get his commission, the travel agent theirs and I, a good deal. On the way to the hotel I learn that we were booked in the biggest and plushest waterfront resort and that only people with "beeg mawney" go there, obviously expecting a big tip, but by now I realise that this is very much like our social scenario. I smile and nod. and don’t tip at the end of the trip

Hilton Phuket is everything that one sees in big Hollywood movies and then some more. There is a theatrical quality about this place, complete with Japanese gardens, multiple swimming pools, smiling staff sing songing swadeeka and kaphukhaa. We order in lunch, a nasi goring, which like all deluxe five stars is nothing to write home about. A short rest and we walk across to the sea. I have never felt so overdressed in a sleeveless kurta and jeans as I did when we were walking on the pristine beach, catching onto the last sunset of our 24th year, holding hands as the waves gently washed our feet. Tender moment and I didn’t want it to ever end. We must have walked for at 4 kms that evening, catching in on the local sights and sounds, grabbing a delicious meal at a shack(which even gave us a complimentary fruit platter),buying some clothes more suited to the temperament of the place. Phuket is not very expensive and I was really wondering if I would have the guts to wear the short shorts that I was made to pick up. The Thais are very musical people, almost all eating places, big or small have singers crooning away soft romantic English numbers, encouraging clients to step in for a whiff of good old fashioned romance and an excellent meal. Karon, the part of town that we were booked in is a far cry from Patong, which is where the famed Thai night life happens. This part is more sedate, hardly any loud Indians. In my hotel we had no Indians- strange but true. I expected the place to be filled with Indians.

My silver wedding anniversary started with an early breakfast and a pick up for our cruise to the islands. The Thais are also very punctual people. We were told that the Toyota minibus would pick us up between 7.30 and 8 and when we reached at 7.55 we found an irate driver pointing to the watch. Ouch, to think I,a stickler for punctuality, am getting chastised for being late. The drive to the pier takes almost an hour and then we are escorted to our boat. I don’t know if words would do justice to our cruise that day. We are greeted by a smiling Alice- or so he called himself , who was our guide for the day. Witty, charming and a very seasoned tourist guide, he chatted up with us as we cruised towards the first island, playing silly games and challenging the passengers. We learnt how to make roses from straws, while music was being belted out from the alley. Everyone seemed to be enamoured of Psys “gangam style”. There was an ample supply fruit and drinks to start with. My co passengers were Russians, Germans, and Egyptians. the ladies all in bikinis, the men topless. At least I didn’t feel overdressed as the Egyptian ladies were more covered than me, but the attitude was same for everyone. The first island had us all in canoes, beautiful stalactites and stalagmites, earth shattering silence when the caves opened up.. By then we were all on nodding to each other and a few words to each other level from being absolute strangers. The experience left us all speechless. I couldn’t help but admire the efficiency of the cruise people- even before the anchor was thrown in, the canoes were all on the sea with the guides. The first step into the canoe was wobbly, but thereafter whenever I stepped into the canoe, I felt that I was doing it for a lifetime. After each canoe stint, the efficiency of the people impressed me once again as all the canoes were firmly in place by the time we settled in on our seats. A complete dreamlike quality settled in both of us as we canoed, saw limestone caves, photographed, smiled and generally forgot all the cares. The spouse who normally hates water was the first to get into water and give me a dunk. He even canoed me from the boat to one of the many islands that we stopped to laze around. This coming from a man, who doesn’t know how to swim, is more of a mountain person was a pleasant 440V jolt for me. An excellent lunch served on board- completely Thai and utterly delicious. Our man Alice got a guitar and crooned to us. He even managed to get a lady boy for us on board to dance to gangam style, sit on the laps of unsuspecting men and embarrass the life out of them. All in good fun and no one really was in a moral policing mood. Soon the day came to an end and we were back to the pier. Somewhere down the cruise someone had clicked pictures of all of us and put in a coral frame and sold it to us at 200 bhatts each. Smart operators, and we all went along- too happy with the cruise to stop them from making some more money from us. The evening saw us in the famed night life area Patong. I wouldn’t go too much into details-everyone knows what all are available and its enough to say that we have been there and done it all. The one thing that struck me as odd, is that people drink alcohol on empty stomachs. No accompaniments. No wonder they don't put on fat despite drinking so much. A woman is not molested on the roads. Can't say the same for unaccompanied men though. Funny to see the spouse’s obsession with me these days I think we had enough of the place in about 2 hours and we longed to go back to our serene Karon area. We came back to the start of the marina and decided that

we will get inside the place where the music was good. We stopped at a bistro called the Sunset Restaurant where a Filipino singer was crooning Tom Dooley and we walked into the place. Had the most fabulous  sea food dinner and innovative drinks-one of them was called smile princess - the drink hit my senses faster than I could say Jack Robinson and this princess was giggling all through the dinner and then the walk back home. Fortunately there was no hangover and we spent the next day lazing on the beach, getting a sunburn. The evening was reserved for Simon cabaret. Simon Cabaret- I have never seen a show of this fantastic proportion, magnificence and international standards. And to think that all the performers were lady boys- they looked so beautiful and glamorous. The music was contemporary, the performances choreographed aesthetically, the props..oooh lala. The senses were spinning out of control at the end of the show. One can even get oneself photographed with the glamorous lady boys. The best thing about Phuket is - if you book for any package they provide pick ups and drops to the hotel. But the spouse had more tricks up his sleeve. We dropped off somewhere in between and he rented one of the big 250 CC types Honda scooters, Bright red, snazzy and all for 300 bhatts per day. A smaller scooter was available for 200 bhatt, per day. The owner keeps the passport and one has to fill up the gasoline at the time of returning the scooter. A very cheap option of exploring the place. We vroomed into our hotel and slept off in anticipation of the next day. A word of caution here however-one could be in a lot of trouble with the local police if one didn’t have an international driving license. It was a huge risk that we took and fortunately we were not checked at any point.

Post breakfast we both wore our respective helmets and were transported back to the 80s when the mode of conveyance was two wheelers, but never these powerful ones. And there we were - man and woman ripping around town- seeing the Chalong temple, the aquarium, the sunset point, the smaller alleys, chatting up with locals, eating on the fisherman’s pier, catching beautiful vistas, with the sun scorching the body and the wind blowing through the hair. Got a bad sunburn, which may take weeks to recover from, but the experiences were worth many more sunburns. By the end of the 3 days the body could not take it physically but the mind wanted more. Parking is free everywhere is Phuket, only one had to watch out for which side of the road parking was allowed in certain areas. We returned the scooter to the owner, not without regret and went back home, happy and sad at the same time. The first part of our vacation was over and we would be flying out to Bangkok the next day. I found myself wishing that we stayed back in Phuket for the balance period. But I guess all good things come to an end. Bangkok would be another story I guess.